5 Mistakes You’re Making in Your Online Dating Profile
Are you killing your first dates before they start?
You might be if your dating profile is scaring off potential matches.
But don’t worry — we get it. However, we’ve got more than first-date-awkwardness empathy. We know exactly what mistakes you’re making. We want to tell you how to fix them.
If you’re trying to find a girlfriend online, check your dating profile to see if you’re making one of these fatal mistakes.
1. Writing a Lifeless Biography
Rule #1: Don’t write a boring profile. Because no one wants to read a boring profile. But also, remember that you’re not boring!
Okay, you might like long walks on the beach. But who doesn’t like that? But if you include that, then you’ve written a generic and lifeless profile. Because even if you do take long walks on the beach every night, it doesn’t actually say anything about who you are.
It’s hard to describe what a catch you are in a few seconds. This is especially because you’re already used to what makes you interesting. You were born. Someday you’ll die. Tell them about what happened in between!
Take the time to think about what makes you unique or exciting. Then, capture it with words the best way you can. And if it’s interesting, let them know how you got involved.
So you play football every Saturday? Cool. (Boring.) But wait. You play football with youths who are disadvantaged as a form of mentorship and a bit of fun, you say?
Now, that’s something.
2. Lying (Obviously)
Lying is a bit of a weird one because while you shouldn’t do it, analysts from Michigan State University and Cornell say almost everyone does.
The most common lie? Men tend to add an extra half inch to their height. It’s true that there’s a fine line between lying and embellishing the truth. But honestly, you shouldn’t do either. Lying always ends in disappointment when you meet people for a live date. Because unless you can lose 3 stone or grow (or shrink) in between getting a match and going on a date, it’s not going to work.
Here’s the best reason to tell the truth.
Who you are is good enough. Don’t worry about what you perceive as flaws or imperfections. Why? Because if you haven’t lied about it, your date probably won’t notice. Lying says more about you than just that you’re a fibber. It also says you don’t love yourself enough to receive love from someone else.
And a lack of confidence and self-worth is what kills your dating profile far faster than a few extra pounds.
3. Adding the Wrong Pictures
Photos are as tricky as the writing portion of your profile.
Choosing the right pictures is important. Unfortunately, even if you’ve got a great biography, the wrong pictures can send potential matches running. Have you uploaded 6 pictures of your hedgehog? What about a photo of your entire family (including second cousins) in themed outfits?
Did you upload a photo from your first wedding? Don’t do that. Ever.
These might be your favorite pictures. You looked awesome on your wedding day. We get it. But don’t use them. Because as much as your online dating experience is about you, it’s also about potential partners. To help possible matches use your photos to your advantage, follow these tips.
Use your photos to bolster your story. Great pictures tell them who you are.
Here are some easy tips for choosing pictures for dating profile:
- A picture of you on your last vacation
- A full-length photo
- A photo showing your facial features
- A pic of you doing something you love
- A shot of something that illustrates something from your profile
Okay, that was easy. But here’s another quick list of what NOT to add:
- Pictures of you in a group
- Pictures of you in a group of ridiculously good-looking male models
- Pictures of you with another woman
- Pictures that were taken extremely close up
- Blurry photos
- Obviously poorly photoshopped photos
- Weird hats, sunglasses, or undershirts (women hate those)
The truth is that your fellow online dating warriors don’t care if you have professional photos. Though, use them if you have them! They want to put a face to the name. Potential dates want to know what you look like.
So show them! (And reassure them that they’re not being catfished.)
4. Writing an Essay in a Dating Profile
Okay, so you know who you are and what you want. But there’s no need to elaborate on every detail on your dating profile.
Your online profile is like an elevator pitch. You’re not trying to get a proposal before you’ve met. You want someone to show interest and email you.
Start a dialogue, not a relationship.
Keep your profile simple. Include the most important details to you. Tell them what you’re like. Let them know what kind of relationship you’re after. Talk about what you appreciate in a partner.
Mention any dealbreakers if you must. Do the same with must haves. If you’ve got 32 dogs, let her know. If you play guitar like Hendrix, definitely let them know. But, please, don’t write your own personal biography. They don’t want to know who did what to you to make you the way you are.
Seriously, that’s what the second date is for.
5. Being Too Picky
The profiles of hundreds of available single women are at your disposal. It’s not hard to find yourself comparing women like you would holiday prices.
Don’t do it.
Obsessing over every detail prevents you from finding the truly perfect woman.
It’s called analysis paralysis. All of a sudden, you’ll be making petty choices about a woman who listens to an obscure band but lives 500 miles away and a woman who doesn’t but is otherwise perfect and lives next door.
These are five dating profile mistakes almost every man makes. But you don’t need to be one of them.
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