Steps to Conquer Fear that Holds You Back
If fear is the thing holding you back from getting what you want, I have good news.
Fear is completely within your control.
You can learn to understand, manage, and conquer fear by putting a few simple techniques into practice.
Let’s break it down.
How To Conquer Fear
J.P. Morgan says, “The first step towards getting somewhere is to decide that you are not going to stay where you are.”
It’s just that easy. But fear can be crippling, and simply pretending it doesn’t exist isn’t always going to set you up for success.
You have to conquer fear to get the results you want out of life.
Identify Your Fear
Why are you afraid to approach the beautiful woman?
When approaching a woman, it can be easy to be intimidated. This intimidation is probably based in a fear that she will reject you.
Approach anxiety is common. Just identifying your specific fear is the first step to conquering it.
If you have a fear that you will make a fool of yourself, or a fear you will come off like a total creep, those can both be boiled down to a fear of rejection.
If you approach and get rejected, it’s really not the end of the world. She may have a boyfriend or have a different type, and that’s got nothing to do with you.
Perhaps you feel you have a fear of humiliation. If you approach and find yourself humiliated, remember to keep it in an accurate scale: don’t blow it out of proportion. And the girl that would humiliate you likely isn’t “the one” anyway.
Work Through The Worst Case Scenario – It’s Probably Not As Bad As You Think
Take the power out of rejection by envisioning, for a moment, the worst case scenario. A rejection is not life or death: you get a “no” or the conversation simply doesn’t flow naturally, so you move on.
Matching up with a girl is a two-way street, and you may just not be all that compatible.
Don’t equate rejection with failure, and don’t assume the responsibility is all yours.
Simply set up your dating game in a way you like and believe in, and consider this rejection an opportunity to hone your techniques for next time.
Rejection will probably happen, so don’t waste time being afraid of it. Conquer fear by setting yourself up for success with your approach and by realizing that even the worst case scenario isn’t all that bad.
If you don’t approach, you certainly won’t get the girl. If you do and get rejected, you’re no worse off than if you never approached in the first place. Brush it off, and move on to the next one.
Turn Fear Into Excitement
Going for things we want in life is naturally accompanied by a nervous energy.
This nervous energy, when it comes in the form of fear, is going to hold you back.
If you can transform that nervous energy into excitement, you’re setting yourself up for success.
Approaching a beautiful woman can be thrilling. Allow yourself to conquer fear by turning that nervous energy into your biggest fan, not your biggest opponent.
It’s perfectly normal to be excited. That will help you make the girl feel special: which is a key way to grab the attention of those you admire.
Be Confident In Your Approach
Preparation takes the fear out of many other scenarios in life, such as the fear of public speaking, so why shouldn’t the same be true for dating?
A successful approach requires confidence and engagement. If you don’t have anything prepared to say, the conversation will be a lot less likely to flow and you might clam up and waste a good connection.
Think of your opener; a compliment is always good. Who doesn’t like to be complimented?
If the vibe is flowing, have the next step in mind. The next step depends on the scenario, of course, but if you’re in a bar, a great one is to move her to a different part of the venue.
Be prepared with a few conversation topics to keep things moving. Be willing to pivot if you find a topic is a dead-end. One of the key ways to be confident is to eliminate desperation.
Don’t let everything ride on the line in each and every approach. Ditch desperation by keeping each approach in proportion. You don’t have anything to lose, you only have something to gain.
The bottom line is: be confident in who you are and what you have to offer. Many people believe that confidence is the most attractive quality a person can have.
Once you realize that the worst case scenario is not life or death, you can go ahead and throw that fear out the window. In its place, allow yourself to visualize the best case scenario.
If fear makes you imagine how everything is going to go wrong, you’re more likely to attract that outcome.
Visualize success with women to conquer fear. Focus your energy on imagining the best outcome. Don’t waste time imagining everything that could go wrong. Instead, wire your brain to assume success. Imagine you make her laugh, she thinks you’re handsome, and the conversation flows naturally.
With this kind of mindset, it likely will.
If you’re finding it a challenge to conquer fear, find the right approach, or figure out where to meet eligible women in the first place, don’t hesitate to seek out help.
Whether help comes from a great friend who can serve as your wingman or you seek out help from a dating coach, it will help allow you to conquer fear faster than trying to do it on your own.
Check out the Social Attraction live training guide to dating to increase your success with women. You can also easily download our ebook An Education In Online Dating: The Online Dating Guide For The Modern Man In The Cyber Century today!
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